Agmaajtp

Yesterday

Yesterday I did The Shred again ... now today I'm sick. What is it with starting to exercise again and then getting sick? My theory is that by exercising the muscles that have become dormant, I'm releasing all sorts of fun toxins into my body. So not only do I need to drink tons of water to flush them out, I have to deal with the icky side effects. I'm so not enjoying this. I have a sore throat which I HOPE does not turn into a cold.

But the question pops up - what do I do now? Do I try to do The Shred again today, or do I take a day off and see if my throat is better tomorrow? Or perhaps do I try to do something else for today - like go to the mall and walk - instead of The Shred?

The Shred is a very intense work out. I often have to stop while in the middle of it, or modify the exercises so I don't ... well ... so I don't die (haha). But I figure anything's better than nothing, and with as intense a workout as that is, if I do other things to supplement it - like mall walking and eating better - then I'll be on my way to feeling better, being in better shape, and, ultimately (as the ultimate goal always is), losing weight.

I do feel better since I've begun The Shred again. I've lost that bloated-can't-hardly-breathe feeling. Which is nice, considering, y'know, breathing is one of those things that is important in life.

Side note: I need a pedicure.

Yesterday I went grocery shopping and bought some vegetables and some ranch for me to have for snacks. I didn't buy any chips or anything like that (not that I eat a lot of chips). Some of the frozen meals I got are SmartOnes ... so I guess that's better than Hungry Man XXXXXXXL meals. I also got myself turkey lunch meat (cracked peppercorn turkey - yum!) instead of roast beef or salami. So, yum!

Bon appetit!

And it begins again ...

I did The Shred again today. I've certainly lost some of the endurance that I gained the last time I did The Shred. I did it around 9 AM and I'm already sore. My back (I think I finally did the back exercises correctly), abs, and legs are sore. My armpits hurt, lol.

But this is all for the best, right?

What's my excuse this time? Depression. Surely.

But I've figured out something else ... I don't know what it feels like to be thin. It's hard to imagine something I've never been. I know what it's like to be thinner than what I am .... but not the ideal goal that I have. That's one of the reasons why I decided to start up again ... I was getting that bloated-hard-to-breathe feeling. That and I saw an old friend not too long ago who had gained some weight and I realized that is what I must look like to people: the extra weight around the face and in the arms ... pouchy belly and big behind. I don't know ... just didn't paint a purdy picture.

We'll see where this goes.

We'll see.

Day 8: I cheated.

31o.2

That's a total loss of 4.2 lb in a week. That's purty darn good.

I'm discouraged though. I feel good, I'm getting compliments, my body is definitely different. But this morning I'm tired, really tired, for whatever reason. I'm not sure why because I went to sleep at a decent hour. I got up at 4 with Anthony ... but then fell back asleep for like an hour. I think that might be why I'm still tired. The nap did more harm than good.

He's asleep right now, so I got to actually work out without anyone awake.

Another excuse I'm going to use is that the place between my shoulder blades hurts again, and no amount of back-cracking is helping this morning. But I skipped the side lunge and shoulder raises. I did only one set of front lunges and bicep curls. I am doing the cardio and ab-work, and most of the strength exercises. I feel guilty, but also I feel like sometimes you just need a break. So long as I don't do it every day, and I get back into it fully tomorrow morning, then I should be just fine.

This is stupid, as a 4.2 lb loss in a week is nothing to sneeze at, but I wish I lost more. I feel like I've been working my ass off for a measly 4 pounds. I keep telling myself that I lost more fat, definitely, and gained lean muscle. I hope. That's usually something that you tell people to make them feel better if they gained a pound or two, y'know? Not necessarily because you believe it but because you want them to feel better.

Oh well. It is what it is. Only a couple more days of Level 1!!

P.S. - if you do read this blog and want to follow me, please do so. Also, if you do read, leave some comments!! It's always encouraging to see that someone commented on my blog. Makes me feel like I'm not 'talking' to dead air, lol. =)

Day 7: Woohoo!! One week!

The workout goes much faster now. The only time I had to break was during push-ups (which I think I've been doing a little bit wrong until today), and for side-lunges with anterior arm raises. I could probably do the arm raises if I wasn't using 5 lb weights, but I do everything else with them, and my body will adjust eventually.

I'm kinda' scared to move up to Level 2!! I watched it the other day just to see what to expect ... but still. It's gonna' totally kick my butt!!

Tomorrow is weigh-in day. Wish me luck!

I got another compliment from the lady at work yesterday. She pulled my shirt back (I was wearing a real billowy blouse) and was like, "Look at her!" in front of a few of my other co-workers. I was a little embarrassed but really pleased. Then I started walking back to my office and she says, "Look at those saggy pants! You go girl!" LMAO. She's nuts, but oh-so-loveable!

So I take it this mean that The Shred is working. =)

Day 6: I can't believe I'm still doing this!

Any other time, I probably would have quit already. Now that I'm so close, especially to Sunday which is my weigh-in day, I'm getting excited. I've had people already complimenting me on having lost weight. And it hasn't even been a week yet! I'm so excited!

I don't believe I've laid out how I'm going to do this. I will weigh in every week on Sunday, but I will only take progress pictures and measure after each level.

Yesterday I didn't eat so well, but I tried not to eat as much of the bad stuff as I usually would. That was a success. I did have a coke, though! Everything in moderation, right?

Anywho, got to get showered and ready for work (I get to wear jeans today, yay!), but I wanted to write something really quick so ya'll know I did work out today!!

Day 5: Halfway through Level 1!!

Oy vey!

Proud of myself. I had to really talk myself into doing it today, even though I was already awake with the baby. Anthony ended up falling asleep in his swing, so that gave me the opportunity to work out ... but I still didn't feel like it and had to talk myself into it. If I'm going to focus on the positive here (not the 'negative' of having to talk myself into it), I DID IT! I did Day 5.

I am losing steam though. I'm really afraid of sabotaging myself with, "Oh what does it matter? I have so far to go!"

I wonder if weighing in might help my motivation ... I plan to weigh in on Sunday. Maybe I should make a goal to make it until Sunday in order to weigh in. If I don't lose any weight, though, I'm going to be, quite frankly, devastated.

I'm watching Level 2 as we speak, just to see what to expect next Thursday when I start Level 2. It definitely looks harder ... but hopefully by the end of Level 1, I'll be in better shape and it'll just be a little more of a challenge and not something that makes me feel like I'm gonna die. It's nice to see that the girls in the video have some trouble with some of the exercises (Natalie mostly, even though she does the "more challenging' moves), and that they sweat like crazy.

One move I have a lot of problems doing is a dynamic lunge. I can do the squat and press move, but the forward-back and wide-stance side-to-side lunges are really hard for me. I keep losing my balance. So for now, I just do the best I can. Lunges might just be something I'm not meant to do ... at least at this size. Being larger makes the balance thing harder, I think.

Also, it's a little discouraging seeing that most of the women doing the 30 day (baby bump) Shred (http://30daybumpshred.blogspot.com/) are in the low 200s or the 100s. I weigh over 300 lb. I'm over 100 lb overweight for my height. Quite honestly, if I can do this, there's no reason that you can't! Seriously! That isn't meant to be detrimental, but inspiring (if I can be so bold as to say I'm inspiring). This also makes me feel like I have more pressure to succeed because I a) want to show people it can be done, and b) I feel I need to lose more weight because I am heavier.

I've decided that for hitting the 300 lb mark, I'm going to get myself a new lip gloss (or lip stick, whichever). Losing 15 lb is nothing to sneeze at, and there's no reason not to reward myself. It's my first goal to reach, and it deserves a reward!

I strongly recommend a goal and reward system. I think it helps keep you on track because you have something fun and nice to look forward to and do for yourself. I know this is dumb, but I'm excited to get the lip gloss. And then excited to get the nail polish. They're just little girly things that make you feel nice. I like it!

Side note about personal life: We're thinking about moving back to the other side of town. It's Sean's former apartment complex and we might be able to get a 2 bedroom with den apartment (essentially a 3-bedroom) for cheaper than what we pay for our townhouse. We really want to get out of here because the owners of this townhouse are ridiculous. I don't know if it's going to happen, but it's an exciting possibility to stay there until we have enough saved up for a house. =)